The Ready Writer

So, I realize that I haven't posted a single thing since the New Years started. I'll first start off by saying Happy New Year! Although, March is almost over so what? (LoL) It's been a rough three months kind of for me since the year started. I made a list of things I'd like to do and accomplish before the year is out and I've done a couple of things. I backslid a few times but I'm still human right? Nobody's perfect save the Lord.

So yeah, I find my biggest achilles heel lately is motherhood. I love it and I hate it in one breath. I'm trying to learn that it's not entirely good to keep putting myself down. I shouldn't considering the nonsense I've seen women do before they've even pushed the child out. Then there's the nonsense they've done afterwards. Sometimes you have to question why did they even keep their child, but that's always a gray area...and a WHOLE other subject. Besides, who am I to judge? I still have quite a bit of growing up to do myself.

My child acted out last night, and it didn't occur to me that I should've been tearing her behind up. I let pressure get to me and it pretty much made me ashamed when I finally did snap. But yeah, I think I should backtrack a moment and then update everyone briefly on life.

First off, I'm having another child. I'm almost at the finish line and boy is it hard. I'm not going to take away from the beauty of pregnancy and giving birth, but as soon as this is over, I'm getting on that five year plan. Shay will not be multiplying anymore for the next few years if she can help it. But truly, the Lord has blessed me. My first child didn't give me any problems and my second one although a little hard to carry back and forth everywhere isn't either. I can't wait to meet him/her. (The sonographers say HER, but I'm still in denial. I'll love whatever comes out though LoL)

Next, Cash finally got the copyright for her story! I'm excited for her. I've never seen anybody physically go through the process so I don't know. She wants me to put out something next but I'm so unsure of which story to pick. I have so many but they have MUCH upheaving to do. I need something inspiring and something real. I have family members reading this also, so I pretty much need to incorporate my style without being all "out there" like I normally would. Maybe one day I'll grow the balls, but my mother asked me how I would feel if my grandfather read it. Although I don't see him reading it for pleasure I have to take that all into consideration.

But yeah, I can't wait for my turn although it's scary at the same time. I don't want to be away from my family too much and such other things. Maybe I'll be able to have my kids travel with me. I don't know what the future holds in that arena but I'm happy to be given the chance. I hope to use my gifts for good because quite a few people need healing. Some of them seek that healing through books, like I had once upon a time.

But yeah, life is forever changing and there's so much for me to grab a hold of. I hope I don't lose my mind before I do. The Lord will never give me more than I can handle though. Hopefully I remember that next time my child tries to drive me crazy. But yea, enough of my rambling on for now. Until next time!